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Mark LaFountain

Welcome to the IHoP v.2

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Been drinking a lot of high gravity stouts lately. Figured I would share some of my opinions on the best, and worst, I have tried over the last 2 or 3 weeks.

 

First, I hate IPAs... No, I really hate IPAs. Ales just suck, no matter how you color them... although admittedly I occasionally enjoy a cherry wheat when it is hot out and I am feeling a little foo-foo. I am a big fan of lagers in the summer, but during the winter I like a heavy stout. Not a porter, not a bock, I like a stout.

 

I have recently ventured out into chocolate stouts. I have become a big fan of them... HUGE fan. I have always liked heavy milk stouts and double stouts, but the chocolates are amazing. I have also tried some bourbon stouts as well. I am going to share them in the order I would buy them, cost and price considered. In at least one case (Dragon's Milk) I have placed it lower on the scale just because it is so fucking expensive, and IMO not worth the money. I will rate them from 1-100 after my input on them, based solely on flavor not price.

 

Southern Tier Brewery's Choklate is fucking amazing. Far and away my favorite beer of all time. It is really heavy, has an extreme bitter chocolate flavor, and enormous alcohol content. The head is darker than any I have ever seen, and it tastes like bitter bakers chocolate. Interestingly, you don't taste alcohol at all. It is extremely filing, and will flat out get you fucked up. I grabbed one on tap at lunch one afternoon and inhaled it in ~10 minutes. I ordered a second and about half way through it I realized I was pretty well buzzed. It is labeled at 10% alcohol, but it hit me like a fuckin' hammer. It is spendy; on tap we paid $8 for 12 ounces, and in the store I only found it in 22s at $9 apiece. I drank 3 one night after work, and split one with a co-worker... I should not have driven home. I am hesitant to give anything 100, and I have vasilated on my rating while writing the rest of my reviews out, but I simply cannot give 100 to anything I am not in love with. So I give Choklate 100.

 

Brooklyn Brewery's Black Chocolate stout still sits near the top of my list. Choklate edges it out overall, and I feel that the Choklate is even worth the extra money, but since Choklate is so damn hard to find, Brooklyn is an easy "hell yeah". Brooklyn is not as heavy as the Choklate, but it is still very full. The alcohol flavor and aroma is really strong, and it is also a 10% brew, but I think it is an honest 10%. Chocolate flavor is slightly sweet and really nicely balanced with bitter stout. I pay $9-10 for a 4 pack. This is a brilliant stout. If the alcohol flavor and aroma were a bit less, this would score higher. It is no a knock on this beer, it is incredible, but it could use a little more balance. 97

 

Southern Tier again visits my top 3 list with their Double (2X) Milk Stout. I like a nice milk stout, but I usually feel like something is missing. This milk stout is everything a milk stout should be. The texture is very full and creamy, and the texture carries out into the flavor. The bitter is well balanced by the creamy flavor into an easy to drink stout. Don't get me wrong, it is not your run of the mill Guinness, it is a real solid stout, but it is easy to drink. At $8 for a 6 pack, this 9% stout is definitely the most affordable, high quality stout I have had my hands on it a long time... maybe ever. This is easy. It is everything it should have been, and more than I expected. It is brilliant, and scores a 96.

 

Samuel Smith's Organic Chocolate Stout steps in softly at number 4. I say this because I like the listed #5 better, but the pricepoint makes SS a winner. This is the only beer that is an import on my list, and deservedly so. Obviously the foreign market has not gravitated to high gravity beers, nor have they gravitated to really heavy, bitter stouts. This stout is light on the pallete, with a decent, almost light chocolate flavor. Nothing is overpowering about this beer, it is extremely well balanced and extremely easy to drink. I had to add this to this list for those of you who like Guinness. It has a much nicer flavor, and a similar alcohol content (only 5% for this brew), and it is a tad more expensive, but it is not outside the realm of the more mainstream stouts in any way. I prefer a heavier, more rich beer. But I don't want to take away from a well balanced, more "mainstream" style mid gravity stout. 94

 

Dragon's Milk had me so fucking stoked to try, but it was a disappointment. Overall it is sitting firmly in my top 5 stouts right now, but the implication of what it was really made me expect more. It is a bourbon barrel stout... How fucking exciting is that for a fanatic of high end bourbons like me? The bartender who turned me on to the Choklate tried to get me to try the Dragon's Milk as well, claiming the DM actually had a bourbon flavor, not just the typical undertones of a bourbon barrel stout. So I snagged some, cringing at the price of $18 for a fucking 4 pack. Yeah, that was not a misprint... at 10% it is strong, but the buzz felt dirty compared to the Southern Tier and Brooklyn chocolate stouts. The bourbon flavor is an undertone, it was not terribly strong. It was well balanced, actually, but I was hoping for more. The alcohol aroma is pretty strong, but the flavor is really well buried beneath the other flavors. I really do like this beer, but it is expensive. 96.

 

Now for the bad...

 

I also tried Hi Wire's Chocolate stout. I hate to judge this as a bad beer, because to be honest I had tried several really good beers that day. I had a couple Choklate's at lunch, than a couple ST Milks, and a Dragon's Milk before trying this. To me it was very flat, and almost had a hint of an IPA as well. NOt my favorite, but my pallate may have been a bit heavy due to the other stouts I had tried that day. I'll give it a 65.

 

 Fuck Bell's. They make, from what I understand, a great IPA. They are known for their IPAs. Their Kalamazoo Double Stout, is an IPA. It was fucking atrocious. I hate to say this, but I spent ~$10 for a 6 pack, and dumped 1/2 of one on the ground it was so bad. I gave the rest of the 6 pack away, it was horrible. The 100 rating on the price tab was fucking bullshit. It should have been -100

 

Anyone interested in these beers can ask for a picture to see if you can find them locally. A group of us tend to try different beers, and I have been sharing with friends, so most are stored on my phone as I have texted my beer drinking buddies..

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Sounds like a cat being raped

 

 

 

Sounds like a V12 with straight cut gears.

 

 

Four CBR600 engines juryrigged into a 2.4L V16

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Thinking of gutting my kitchen as well. If we don't find a place we like, I am remodeling the whole house.

Didn't you just finish your kitchen last year?
I did the floor, as cheap as possible and yes it'd get ripped out, lol

We finished the house to sell. Going to switch from lake front looking since they jumped $400k in the past year and look for other deeded houses. If we can't find something with a better layout, neighborhood, lake front than hours for under $1M I'll have no problems spending $200k to really fix mine.

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Sounds like a cat being raped

Sounds like a V12 with straight cut gears.

Four CBR600 engines juryrigged into a 2.4L V16

link?

Sounds nutty!

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Sounds like a cat being raped

I'll take your word for it with your experience.

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Thinking of gutting my kitchen as well. If we don't find a place we like, I am remodeling the whole house.

 

well if it takes you as long to find a house as it does a car...............

Ha, I've been looking since 07. When I bought this house I had been through more than 300 looking. I am pretty sure I've topped that now.

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Seth wow. I used to think we shared a lot of tastes. tongue.png

No really, Bell's does NOT make a good IPA. Great brewery in general, but not for pales. Strong suit is making big beers not have the bad aspects of tasting big. Amber is delicious as well.

I used to be big into stouts, but pretty much drink PA's now, lol.

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Lol

Yeah. I spent 6000 and my lifetime faucet is almost dead.

How many years did you get out of it?

4-5, but in our house it probably gets used 2 times as much as the average house.

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Wish my damn wheels would ship. Riding around high on stock wheels... lmao

I am stuck on the flavored vodka kick. Mello Yello and whipped cream flavored vodka is just awesome. I normally don't even like vodka either.

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Sounds like a cat being raped

Sounds like a V12 with straight cut gears.

Four CBR600 engines juryrigged into a 2.4L V16

link?

Sounds nutty!

 

 

Everything on Google seems to point to YouTube or French websites.

 

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Seth wow. I used to think we shared a lot of tastes. tongue.png

No really, Bell's does NOT make a good IPA. Great brewery in general, but not for pales. Strong suit is making big beers not have the bad aspects of tasting big. Amber is delicious as well.

I used to be big into stouts, but pretty much drink PA's now, lol.

No idea the names of beer styles, but I love me some hopslam. Usually buy a mini keg of it. Needs to be finished in one night though. Gets skunky.

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I have a headache so bad it is migraine level... But it is tension related somehow.

If this is a cluster headache, I'm going to freak. No meds are working and I feel awake. I have had a bunch of caffeine to help the headache, but not enough to keep me awake.

If I'm getting cluster headaches again, I'm fucked.

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Another one charging US prices for chinese labor.

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I have a headache so bad it is migraine level... But it is tension related somehow.

If this is a cluster headache, I'm going to freak. No meds are working and I feel awake. I have had a bunch of caffeine to help the headache, but not enough to keep me awake.

If I'm getting cluster headaches again, I'm fucked.

need some valium

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Looks like I am going on a road trip tomorrow! :)

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Ryan, I literally meant who. ie, would I know a screen name from somewhere?

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Ryan, I literally meant who. ie, would I know a screen name from somewhere?

 

From what i hear, the owner of that company, Sean(can't remember his last name) is also the same guy who is going to take over Sundown Audio completely once Jacob transfers ownership over to him in the near future.

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That is a joke right?

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I did not get that info first hand so i am only passing it on.

 

It goes on down the grapevine from people who "talk"

 

I've heard he is getting out of audio(like how Anthony Collova is trying to also)

 

PS- i know this as first hand knowledge as i've talked to him before about this over the phone(ANT) that he is prepared to sell all 5 of his audio websites because he is getting completely out of audio as well.

 

The Sundown talk was told to me through some people in Team Sundown several weeks ago.  

 

It must not to be too important or time critical yet as it's not been publicly posted but i wouldn't distrust the grapevine.

 

It's all facebook talk that gets posted online but i cant stare at that crap so it's just told to me before it gets deleted.

 

Just like.. I have some interesting info about Skar that was recently posted on facebook too that would make all of you happy..  VERY happy..  Too early to tell, imo though.

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only problem is that he'd enjoy it

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I have a headache so bad it is migraine level... But it is tension related somehow.

If this is a cluster headache, I'm going to freak. No meds are working and I feel awake. I have had a bunch of caffeine to help the headache, but not enough to keep me awake.

If I'm getting cluster headaches again, I'm fucked.

 

Ouch. I'm stocked with imitrex and relpax for my next one. angry2.gif

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