Dark Helmet: Fire a warning shot across her nose. [Warning shot almost hits Vespa's Benz] Dark Helmet: Careful, you idiot! I said across her nose, not up it! Crosseyed Gunner: [lifts helmet, revealing that he's crosseyed] Sorry, sir! I'm doing my best! Dark Helmet: ... Who made that man a gunner? Crosseyed Major: I did, sir. [also crosseyed] He's my cousin. Dark Helmet: [to Sandurz] Who is he? Colonel Sandurz: He's an Asshole, sir. Dark Helmet: I know that! What's his name? Colonel Sandurz: That is his name, sir. Asshole, Major Asshole. Dark Helmet: ... And his cousin? Colonel Sandurz: He's an asshole too, sir. Gunner's mate, First Class, Philip Asshole. Dark Helmet: How many assholes have we got on this ship, anyhow? [The entire bridge crew, except for one person, stands up and raises a hand.] Entire Bridge Crew: Yo! Dark Helmet: I knew it, I'm surrounded by assholes... [Closes helmet] Keep firing, assholes!