Acidburn

>REPLY: >Dear Troubled User: > >This is a very common problem that men complain about. > >Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 , thinking that it is >just >a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and >is >designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING !!! >It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0 . >It >is impossible! to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system >once >installed. > >You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not >allow >this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony - Child Support . >I >recommend that you keep Wife1.0 and work on improving the situation. I >suggest >installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software >augmentation. > >The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because >ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system >will >return to normal anyway. > >Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. >Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0 , >Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2 ! > >However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will >cause >the system to launch the program >Nag Nag 9.5 . Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of >Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and >Diamonds 5.0! > >WARNING!!! DO NOT , under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short >Skirt >3.3 . This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause >irreversible >damage to the operating system. > >Best of luck, >Tech Support

>Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 . I soon noticed that >the >new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space >and >valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other >programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as >Poker >Night 10.3 , Football 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5 , and Racing 3.6 no >longer >run , crashing the system whenever selected. > >I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my >favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , >but >the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0 . Please help! > >Thanks, >A Troubled User. (KEEP READING) >______________________________________

/\ funny it made me giggle

Qanta's Pilot gripe sheet - your morning laugh After every flight, Qantas pilots fill out a form, called a "gripe sheet," which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by Qantas' pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by maintenance engineers. By the way, Qantas is the only major airline that has never had an accident. ... Enjoy! P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement. S: Almost replaced left inside main tire. P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough. S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft. P: Somethin! g loose in cockpit. S: Something tightened in cockpit! . P: Dead bugs on windshield. S: Live bugs on back-order. P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent. S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground. P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear. S: Evidence removed. P: DME volume unbelievably loud. S: DME volume set to more believable level. P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick. S: That's what they're for. P: IFF inoperative. S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode. P: Suspected crack in windshield. S: Suspect you're right. P: Number 3 engine missing. S: Engine found on right wing after brief search. P: Aircraft handles funny. (I love this one!) S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious. P: Target radar hums. S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics. P: Mouse in cockpit. S: Cat installed. And t! he best one for last.................. P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer. S: Took hammer away from midget

the ones in my avatar are AWESOME and i want to see them but she's mean to me

boobs are cool

freaking FC

muuuust whoooooreee

and that's just annoying

but then there are a lot of bad people

there are a lot of people

/\ TOP w00t!

so much crap going on there

just read through CA.com

just there were those silly shorts in the way

the other pic you posted was very nice though

Ryan, you did scare me with that pic.... very much

except that damn FC gets soooo annoying

i guess i'll just have to whore myself

now its only me

there were like 6 people in here

/\ thats a lot of quoting

i already told you, you havent been here long enough Now you can tell him what it takes, but I don't think he'll go that far. what does it take? You don't even want to know. yes i do! You have to email Denim a naked picture of yourself. i can do that, no problem at all denim, whats ur email? [email protected] but no naked pictures of your self please haha alright, then what does it take to get no FC?

actually... that was 35 pages in a bit over an hour im impressed

christ guys, 35 pages in 3 hours... impressive