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This guy wakes up out of a deep sleep and, feeling real horny, nudges his wife awake and asks, "Why don't we get it on, huh?" She replies, "I have an appointment at the gynecologist tomorrow and you know I don't like to make love the night before." So the husband agrees and rolled back over and started to go back to sleep. A few minutes later, he nudges his wife again and asks, "You don't by any chance have a dentist's appointment tomorrow, do you?" wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

yep...really good beer... wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Marriage - Part I Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules: "I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?" His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night ......... whether you're here or not." ************************************ Marri…

A husband walks into Fredrick's of Hollywood to purchase some sheer > > > > >lingerie for his wife. He is shown several possibilities that range > > > > >from $250 to $500 in price, the more sheer, the higher the price. He > > opts > > > > >for the most sheer item, pays the $500 and takes the lingerie home. > > > > > > > > > >He presents it to his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on and > > > > >model it for him. Upstairs, the wife thinks, "I have an idea. It's > so > > > > >sheer > > > > >that it might as well be nothing. I won't put i…

http://www.big-boys.com/articles/dotmove.html I got to level 4, see what you can do.

so i got a ticket yesterday for speeding. Does my insurance double?

Patent app

Bloodninja: I lick your earlobe, and undo your watch. Sarah19fca: mmmm, okay. Bloodninja: I take yo pants off, grunting like a troll. Sarah19fca: Yeah I like it rough. Bloodninja: I smack you thick booty. Sarah19fca: Oh yeah, that feels good. Bloodninja: Smack, Smack, yeeeaahhh. Bloodninja: I make some toast and eat it off your ass. Land O' Lakes butter all in your crack. Mmmm. Sarah19fca: you like that? Bloodninja: I peel some bananas. Sarah19fca: Oh, what are you gonna do with those? Bloodninja: get me peanuts. Peanuts from the ballpark. Sarah19fca: Peanuts? Bloodninja: Ken Griffey Jr. Yeaaaaahhh. Sarah19fca: What are you talking about? Bloodninja: I'm sp…

hehe... wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

give this a click wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

click here for some druken fun... wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

today i started my new job... i run the machine that inserts/crimps the projectile into the case of the 30mm round fired in the A-10 (warthog) Thunderbolt tank buster attack plane. we load TP (target practise) HEI, AP (depleted uranium and others) and several others. the TP projectile weighs in at .84 pd.....hehe..cool huh? that works out to a 5,880 grain bullet... anyway, i think i now have the coolest job ever.....btw, the pay is good, the benefits great and i don't work hard... wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

....and she thought that these were Her cats... Today, I came home and found this in my rec room. I've still got a bunch of drivers sitting around down there (on shelves). Apparently this Vega & Eclipse were the most comfy though! And, these boys had better grow out of this habit!

NOW!!! lol... More people should sit there and wait for people to show up... I am in there right now.

A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children. "You all have obsessions," he observed. To the first somewhat-portly mother, he said, "You are obsessed with eating. You've even named your daughter Candy." He turned to the second Mom, wearing an expensive fur coat; "Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Mercedes." He turns to the third Mom, who was somewhat inebriated; "Your obsession is alcohol. This too manifests itself in your child's name, Brandy." At this point, the fourth mother, who was wearing a skintight leather skirt, gets up, takes her little boy by the hand and …

so what do you think guys, this or my rims?

http://www.getannoyed.com/

>A man and a woman are riding next to each other in first class >on a plane. The woman sneezes, then takes a tissue and gently >wipes it between her legs. The man isn't sure he saw what she >did and decides he is probably hallucinating. A few minutes >pass. The woman sneezes again. She takes a tissue and gently >wipes it between her legs. The man is about to go nuts. He >can't believe that he's seeing what he's seeing. >A few more minutes pass. The woman sneezes yet again. She >takes a tissue and gently wipes it between her legs yet again. > >The man has finally had all he can handle. He turns to the >woman and says, "Three times you've…

A new guy in town walks into a bar and notices a very large jar behind the bar. It's filled to the brim with ten-dollar bills. The man guesses, there must be thousands of dollars there. He approaches the bartender and asks him, "What's up with the jar?" The bartender tells him, "Well, you pay ten dollars and if you pass three tests then you get all of the money." "What are the three tests?" "Pay first. Those are the rules." So the guy gives him the ten bucks and the bartender adds it to the jar with the other bills. The bartender says, "OK, here's what you have to do: "First, you have to drink that whole gallon of pepper tequila, the WHOLE thing at once AND you c…

A Texan is drinking in a Florida bar when he gets a call on his cell phone. He hangs up, grinning from ear to ear, and orders a round of drinks for everybody in the bar because, he announces, his wife has just produced a typical Texas baby boy weighing 25 pounds. Nobody can believe that any new baby can weigh in at 25 pounds, but the Texan just shrugs, "That's about about average back home, folks...like I said, my boy's a typical Texas baby boy." Congratulations showered him from all around, and many exclamations of "WOW!" were heard. One woman actually fainted to sympathy pains. Two weeks later the Texan returns to the bar.The bartender says, "Say, you are…

One morning a husband took a pair of underwear out of the drawer. "What the ?????" he said to himself as a little "dust" cloud appeared when he shook them out. "April," he hollered into the bathroom, "why did you put talcum powder in my underwear?" She shot back: "It's not talcum powder. It's Miracle Grow." now ya know the......rest of the story. hehehehahhahaha wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

I was thinking about getting two color-tone leather seats to replace the crappy cloth in my car. Is it worth the trouble? or will it burn my butt off in the humid/hot weather in Louisiana? I was thinking maybe either two toned perforated leather or leather with suede insert... Right now they are offering 599 for the basic leather (+30 for two tone, +25 shipping, +85 for suede or +35 for flat perforated inserts) from http://leatherseats.com/ until Nov. 1 or 679 after.

Can any of you Photoshop wizards whip up a couple logos for me ... don't need to spend tons of time on it, just a simple logo. All it needs to contain is "2005" ... it'll eventually wind up on my vehicle somewhere. Color can be used. A cool font is good - straight lines is cool as well. Doesn't have to be too large. Size 30-40 is plenty. I like backgrounds such as ... ... the lighter blue part. I seen some other examples somewhere where there was text was blended into the background. Thanks for any help. - Steve

Okay skipped 1st class to sleep and kinda forgot the extra sleep. Went to philosophy and talked to my friend Ryan. Ryan calls this kid who has had His Rockford that I want, sence least summer. Kid calls Ryan back after class and tells Ryan to have m go get it later. Well in the meantime we go look at a friends old beat ass rice Neon. Rice rims, and bad tint. Needs a starter. Well Ryan looks to buy it and I tell chris (my friend) to go get the amp with me. On the drive home I suggest my Pioneer TS-W33C subs all 4 of them and a home made basically wall, and my old Pioneer amp the Rockford would be replasing for his 1995 Dodge Neon SE. He calls his dad and his dad agrees. No…